the legend
Squatting Lizard
creator of White Man Surprise
squattinglizard@cox.net
Welcome to Web site. I Squatting Lizard. This my story. You read.
I grew up with Tohono O'Odham people of Arizona near place now called town of Ajo (that's "Ah-ho" for non-Arizona types).
I always feel calling to create some great thing. I think and think out in hot desert sun about what this must be. I drink much water and eat occasional snake for snack. I do this long time.
One night sleep not come, so I take walk under desert stars. I find old medicine man in desert, grilling midnight snack of fresh-caught javelina and selected desert vegetables as side dish. He offer some. I try. Grilled javelina OK but very bland. Like rubber chicken. I think: "Oy veh, this stuff needs something. For this I walked hours in a dark desert?"
Suddenly voice speak from stars, like Mufasa in Lion King. "This medicine man is a putz, eating such dreck. You, boychik! You got the chutzpah, you make the sauce! I give you this desert filled with everything you need! This is your mission in life!" Then voice from stars fade away, muttering "Oy, another supernova. This I need like a hole in the head."
I stand amazed out in nighttime desert. Voice from Great Spirit say this my great thing to create! Real Native American barbeque sauce! First thing, I go hunt up great grandmother, she tell me of secret recipe stashed in moccasin. I take. I consult other medicine man with better taste, look up ancient ingredients and recipes. I put all together to create perfect barbeque sauce blends — one mild and sweet like spring desert breeze, other hot as Arizona desert in blaze of summer. I decide to share my perfect barbeque sauces with the world, so I go on World Wide Web. Now everyone from Tokyo to Tel Aviv can try perfect Native American barbeque sauce!
Try my sauce and be amazed at flavors you miss before. You never go back to same old regular mass-produced dreck again.
